September 11th, We Never Forget

Today is Sep, 11th 2020.

I remember last time when I was young, joined the school trip.

As I recalled, while dining for breakfast saw the Sep 11, tragedy news LIVE. Back then was small don't really felt much. At first sight,

I thought was computer-animated couldn't be real then later aware that the news is real.

Life is short, Unpredictable... People come and Go, Appreciate them before they expired. Today, remind that those people were on the building would never know that morning was their last day on earth.

Revisit the Videos, seeing people rather jump than being burnt, Ashes and smoke filled the air, screams, and shout desperate ask for help.

This year 2020, I have lost many friends and acquaintance they died before their time, I believe in fated destiny, some are around my age, some your just 17,21 sad to see young people, teen, and young adults lost their life.

Final words, no one lives forever. Love them while they are alive. I am grateful to be alive and well will express my appreciation to all my friends and fans (hope they never found my blog).

Bros, memories with you will always in My Heart. I love you very much

Sincerely

Justin. 

Yes I am Back, as said Will be back

Was Hiatus since 2018, my recovery period after that accident/ trauma

In 2020, a challenging year

Glad to be Alive, A lot of younger Bros Have passed away :(

Many things, ups, and downs.

Recently Deciding whether to go Full into  Blogger or WordPress.

Most probably I will start more new projects new blogs in WordPress, As Blogger is since 2009, I have noticed a lot of changes a lot of young friends they passed away, went back their blog noticed some of them disappeared, try to find out why a lot of Blogspot account are gone without a trace.

In the end still, the same question should I further develop my BLOG in BLOGGER or WordPress?

Many Opinions, online could be misleading but roughly one has to test it out.

PS: wishing everyone stay healthy and happy always :)

Gamers always be gamer

Honestly speaking Gamers are the same
They blame people for everything but refuse to acknowledge their own faults
If you have a few gamer friends, I believe you would agree what I am saying.

It is always easy to blame, than taking responsibilities over the mess that you have created.

Anyway I have signed out from their accounts, I wash my hand cleaned from the basin.
I hold no accounts to their actions, neither wanna be part of the shit they are in....

April's Fool, Nobody's fool

I am April's fool.

Fool for believing you 2nd time , giving you 2nd chance to hurt me.

Never again I will let you to do this.

Hardening my heart preventing it be hurt again.

I am nobody's fool, giving you 2nd chance doesn't  mean I am stupid  just that cared too much about this relationship.

For now it doesn't  matter for me everyone is the same, people tend to be dishonest and double standards.

These are the attributes I hated the most.

Today is the saddest day, a mixtures of pain, anger and sadness.

I will grow out from this pain. 

Enough of explaining myself, no one hears everyone assuming and not asking, that's fine that is how the world 🌎 operates.

Feeling expressed here have no prejudice to anyone not any religion it is purely from my heart. Feel free to leave my page if you don't  really like an honest mistakes.

Stucked, Am I ?

Am I the only person stucked?

Indecisive in Decision making,

mess all around...

Fear of making mistakes, 

Perfectionist comes in.

I do not know where to start,

I know how to start,

but it seems 

overloaded with facts 

too many choices leave to indecisiveness.

Oh my God, the cycle goes on and on,

Procrastinate, later when actual event is near not much time for preparations,

Regrets kicks in, then get into distractions mode, distracted by games and events doesn't directly related to me. 

Suddenly think like a woman, a lot of things on mind, that I could not get it out. Simply could express myself through writing blogs and journal

Try to use less words to carry more exact meaning and express emotions straight to the Dot.

Recently learned how to tell a story.

Thanksgiving

Give Thanks Songs keep on echoing in my heart
Although this year has been tough year.
by HIS grace I have overcome a lot of trials and testings
well, I am still alive

Really Grateful and contented with that, as long you are living
you have the power to change your circumstances.

Grateful I am Alive to fix all those junks in my life,
Life don't give me second chance but you gave me life, future, and  hope....

Too many things to mention about your greatness, faithfulness in keeping and helping me through.

In summary, give thanks all the blessings e have given me, counts your blessings and you will realised a lot of thing worth give thanks for.

Revisiting the past

Remembering the Past, This was Hill Citi College, A college nearby my House.

Most of my homegrown friend attended this college and graduated from it, what they never expected 

is this college, Wind up.

Alot of my friends are puzzled, some changed career some retake their syllabus in another Local university.

Last time remember My mom did nagged me, telling me why didn't I join this college it was affordable and near my house.

Thank God, I have made my decisions did not based on others judgments nor opinions.

I stood firm on the college that I have selected.

Until Now it still exist TUNKU ABDUL RAHMAN COLLEGE & UNIVERSITY.

Hope all the best is yet to come, now in the midst of attending interviews.

NOVEMBER be nice to me 

Confession of a HeartBroken

It sucks,

Even the person closest to you misunderstand you,

No matter how eager you to explains,

It is true what hurts the most are those that are close.

the misunderstanding keep on snow balling,

People do get tired, I am tired of this Relationship

I tell myself it is Over.

Game Over.

I am leaving, leaving you lonely.

Hardening my Heart 

so I would not be feeling any pains

some pain are worth taking, some are just a waste of time if we keep holding on.

Should I hold on or Give up?

Worth going through the pain again?

Honesty

this is lacking between us.

Whenever an question is asked, you will reply we with another questions.

For my part, I am holding myself ...

Why it is so hard for people to be honest.

Many Are Curious about what is happening

Only Few are truly care.

well I guess this is just reality of Life

I was hit Hard,

Now my life FUCKED

Pretty Fucked

I have wasted the whole year of 2016.

Lesson Learnt

Painful yet memorable Lesson, Life lesson.

I find it therapeutic expressing it in the Blog.

No point whining in Facebook, looking for approval, agreement or likes.

Yes indeed Mother Theresa, is right. Some people enter our life as Blessing, while some enter our life as lesson.

Yet a Painful lesson over the past quarter April, may, June.

I do not wanna Describe it in Details, but it helps me to learn that Human will be human,

Human are realistic, degree of realistic is determine by the degree of their selfishness.

Once a human know what they really want, they are realistic, its the matter of degrees of it.

After today I have decided to be more Realistic person, I will invest more time on myself to make myself more competitive.

Less time will be wasted on wrong people, at wrong places, I will not hesitate

to delete or block contacts.

Do what is necessary to redeem back the lost time. 

In the past alot of time wasted on the wrong people, promised myself will not let anyone waste my time, I will let time DID once after that BYE BYE .

Gotta repick myself up and clear myself from those messed up

Sleepless NIght

Well another Sleepless night.

As night comes people's mind are more active, according to a psychology journal that I have read.
Is it True?

Well I think it is true, according to the journal usual day we are so distracted by lot of stuffs , (need to be done)

As night arise,  we our to do list shorten, and our mind start thinking about past, present and future.
For me I took coffee, and my mind is still very sharp although the body is tired but the mind is spinning fast.

Learn to live at the moment, and do not let the worry of tomorrows nor regret of yesterday robs you of today's blessings. LIVE NOW, have to constantly remind myself.

For now
Goodnight
Nature's calling to bed.

The Returned

Today the Mood of Blogging have returned....
A short updates, yesterday night drank a lot of beer, Guinness stout Drank a Bucket all by myself.
ahem not bad right for an Asian, Chinese boy.... It was an emotional night I just fainted on my bed,
Thank God I brought the last bottle to be finish in my room.

Day2
Waking up, feeling great, but uncertainties hits my mind.
Decision to come back hometown or not hits my mind,
Have to schedule my journey back, whom should I meet?
It is hard to make decision if I go back Ipoh must plan my journey whom I should met for prospecting.
For your info, In financial planning business prospecting is important it is our lifeblood.
Perhaps today, I should just rest don't think too much.
Perhaps I worried, for the pass few weeks I was not-organised, poor time management, too relax.
Now it is the time to redeem myself.

From Now On
I have no time to waste, Filter off  Disqualified Prospects.
I have to make a KIV list and Customers listing.
I have to manage my time well, plan appointment a week ahead.
I have to be discipline myself, no more Procrastination.DO it NOW or NEVER.
Dare to call prospects, overcome the FEAR of calling.
As well as overcoming Procrastination.
Some of these are very costly lesson for me, I have lost so many cases because of this.

All the best overcoming this, see myself again in 2016

Liar

If u all came across him don't panic, just remain calm and don't believe any word spoken by him. Insincerity and lack of genuine

Ain't Good, Life is Move On

Things are not going well this month of June, Business is going slow.

People I have asked for appointment do not wish to come out, I guess I have to endure with it, persevere and change the approach that I have used to meet them.

The month of July will be the month of redemption, I have got another offer letter from another company,  will be running 2 business simultaneously, both are from the same industry and hope I could gain as much experience with AIG. 

Guy who play musical Instrument are Cool right ? haha not talking about myself 

Goodnews During my down moments, I have reignite my passion

 towards music. 

I went back to college join the music composition societies and Music societies.

So good to be back and reconnect with People who loves music.

These Korean Drama about classical music in Pop culture it is inspiring

Here is the Link for Beethoven Virus for Pals from US 

Don't you agree girls on Violin are Sexy hahaha

SAD

I admit I feel Sad.

Couldn't deny it, would like to deny it.

Would like to bury those negatives feelings.

I guess I just release it in form of writing.

I felt people Kinda fake, Hypocrites.

The mouth is hot but the heart is not.

Insincerity really cuts and their smiles is razor blades.

Love to listen to sad songs, during these down seasons.

Enjoying the moments of sadness, betrayel , Loneliness, Misunderstandings.

Keep on telling myself to be strong no matter what, PAIN is temporary Glory is forever.

My Business is not doing good, weird I am not Worry, I lost My feeling....

I feel really bad, 

I hope this won't progress into Depression

I don't want the feeling of Killing myself again.